"Comparison is the thief of joy." -I have no idea "Hi, I've just stepped in dog poop." I'm already on the floor cleaning up a puddle of dog wee. I look up and a man is towering over me like I am his servant. "Someone's dog pooped in the shop, it wasn't my dog! But [...]
So I bust out my best 80's dance moves, the sprinkler, the running man, the kriss kross, the worm. Look, if they're going to make a singer dance, they're going to have to deal with these moves, they brought it on themselves. I aggressively robot my way out of this situation.
"It's incurable." "Bullshit". *Mic drop *Saunters off stage like Beyoncé
"Here I spend my days juggling my day job and my career and having people talk to me like I have no higher education and probably dropped maths. I did drop maths. That's not the point."
"Aaaand Rolling!.... Cut! Chelsea, you have to stop looking at the camera."
"You, I can tell, are a leading lady, but for some reason you are behaving like the best friend."
