An Open Letter to My Hero

“You might have a mom, she might be the bomb, but ain’t nobody, got a mom like mine.  Her loves till the end, she’s my best friend.” 

Meghan Trainor

Dear Mum,

You are a legend, a warrior of the bravest kind, the most courageous woman I know because you wear your heart on your sleeve and no matter how challenging things can be, you stare potential defeat in the face and you say;

“Not today, I have successes to gain.”

Today is your birthday.  I always love the way people question us because you’re too youthful to be a mum to an adult, let alone a grandmother!  You really don’t know how beautiful you are.  I hope that in twenty years-time, when I’m the age you are, which by the way is so freaking young, I’m as stunning as you are, inside and out.

Thank you for being an example to me of what perseverance is.  You never back down from a challenge, even when you think you have given up, somehow you still get out of bed, make a coffee and say “Come at me, world!”

We’ve been best friends for a long time, you and me.  Right from when you were a teenager.  We’ve run through some pretty intense obstacle courses, overcoming things that some people will never experience.

I won’t ever forget your unconditional love and care when I was sick with CFS and CRPS.  Every day, you were up with me, caring for me while I had flare ups, spending your nights researching my conditions in the hope of finding a cure, being my advocate when the world questioned my invisible illness.  There are no words to describe how thankful I am that God gave me a mother like you, someone who so deeply cares for her children and would do anything to help us achieve our dreams, including when mine was simply to walk again.

Not many people can be both Mum and Dad, and you did it.  Over the years, the homework, the sleepovers, questioning boys with their intentions, netball drop offs, leading Pippins, home-school teacher, counsellor, friend and cheerleader.  God knew what He was doing when He gave me a strong female role model like you.  He knew I would need someone to back me up with my ever people-pleasing nature, He gave me you, who has always reminded me to back myself and know my worth.

And now I want you to know yours.

You are worth far more than anything this world has to offer; you are courageous, kind, honest, resilient, intelligent and creative.  You are bold, you are bright, you are far more incredible than you give yourself credit for and you are my mum!

When Dad passed away, you put one foot in front of the other, you taught me that it was okay to cry, you fought on for your children even when you found it hard to fight on for yourself.  It takes a special kind of person, to have lost the love of their life but, to continue on life’s journey knowing that three little humans are watching your every move to know what strength looks like.

Tired and grief-stricken, you would pull us out of our beds on a Sunday morning to be surrounded by love and comfort at church.  On the days where I just couldn’t cope, you would hear my pain and surround me in love, so that I could learn the value of looking after your mental health, so that I could understand that perfection wasn’t an end goal but a way to stay stuck.

I will always be grateful for the transparent person you are, that you value honesty over secrets and that because of that, you heard my tiny three-year-old voice when no one else would, and that through my suffering, I could find healing because the person I trusted the most with my little toddler heart knew what I needed.

Never let anyone tell you that your life has been fruitless, including yourself. That belief is so so far from the truth. Your life has barely even begun, your life achievements are already incredible and you’re only just getting started!

I feel proud of you, when in the evening we sit down to watch TV and I look around the house and see toys that belong to my little niece and know that like me, she is being raised to be a strong and independent female who knows her voice and knows her worth.  I feel proud of you, when I look at your desk, covered in notes and textbooks from hours of study as while you are raising another child, you are also seeking a higher education.  An education that will look after not just you, but future generations of people who will benefit from having you to support them and guide them with your wealth of life experience that no amount of reading about can teach a person.

I feel honoured when I come home at night from a long day at work, and as I’m throwing my bag in my room and changing into dance gear, I see a pile of clean and folded washing and can smell home cooking waiting for me.  I feel honoured, that through this chapter of my life where there is so much going on for me, I have a mother who would open the door to her home, as my home, and make sure there is a place for me even though I’m now an adult.

I feel grateful that before I even speak, you know how I’m feeling and you can relate because you’ve been through the same things, you’ve walked a similar journey and you’ve been through so much with me.  I feel grateful to have a mum who can put herself in my shoes, who I can talk to.

Not many people have a mum like you, and I will be eternally grateful that I am one of the lucky ones.

Keep smiling, Keep being you.

Happy Birthday,

Chelsea xx

“When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness.  She carefully watches everything in her household and suffers nothing from laziness.  Her children stand and bless her.  […] Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.”

Proverbs 31: 26 – 29